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Parenting Column: Childhood squabbles form a normal part of return to school

20/9/2018

 
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Parenting column by Sasha Hart, family care manager at Community Family Care, Staunton

Your child has hopefully settled in after heading back to school.

They were no doubt excited to see friends and have possibly made new ones.

But you may have had the dreaded playground squabble and are not quite sure how to deal with the fallout.

Relax (a bit): it’s normal

Children fall out (and in again) fairly quickly. It is part of children learning how to communicate and deal with differences.

Reassure, hug and listen

Your child might feel as if their world is collapsing. Give hugs, provide shoulders to cry on and support them in managing their emotions.

Help them to help themselves

Encourage your child to think through what they could do to resolve the situation. If there’s been a misunderstanding, how could they try to explain? If the other child is consistently mean to them, who else could they play with instead? Supporting them to come up with their own solutions is great for encouraging problem solving and building their resilience.

Resist the temptation to wade in

Parental instincts might urge you to sort the problem but wait to see if everything settles by itself.

Confronting the other child isn’t fair or appropriate and your child will probably find it embarrassing.

It’s also important to encourage children to problem solve for themselves to develop independence.

Proceed with caution with the other parents

Many parents struggle to accept their offspring have done anything wrong. The children are likely to make up before the week is out which will potentially leave an awkward feud between the parents.

If the other child’s parents confront you it is sensible to suggest ‘let’s leave the children to sort it out’, or similar.

If you feel the incident was serious and the school needs to get involved, perhaps say that you would rather the school dealt with it.

When to speak to the teacher...

If the dispute involved physical violence, becomes persistent, and/ or your child doesn’t want to go to school or is having trouble sleeping, then it’s time to raise it with their teacher.

They can then keep a closer eye on the children, intervening if necessary.

Community Family Care, based at Staunton, Gloucestershire helps families, children and young people in need of additional support.

Click here to download PDF of this article.


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People’s Postcode Trust is a grant-giving charity funded entirely by players of People’s Postcode Lottery.

Our charity received a £4,000 grant from the Trust to go towards IT equipment and to cover training and recruitment costs for five new sessional Family Support Workers.

www.postcodetrust.org.uk
www.postcodelottery.co.uk
Community Family Care
Unit A Kingsholm Mews
76 Kingsholm Road
Gloucester
GL1 3BD
​

01452 840999
info@communityfamilycare.co.uk
  • Community Family Care is part of Community Foster Care
  • Community Family Care is Investors in People accredited
  • Charity Registration Number: 1084124
  • Company Number: 03719101
Website by lizhawkins.co.uk
  • Home
  • About Us
    • Vision, Mission & Values
    • The Team
    • Our Trustees
    • Testimonials
    • Work For Us
  • Our Services
    • Family Group Conferences >
      • FGC Information for Kids
      • FGC Information for Family & Friends
      • FGC Information for Professionals
    • Working For Families
    • BoA Youth
    • Art Journal Project
    • LifeCoach
    • Story Explorers
    • Family and Child Support for Schools
    • Chill and Chat
  • News And Views
  • Useful Links
  • Contact Us